My Daughter Is 3 Months Old & Other Updates

My Baby Girl

How time flies!  It seems like yesterday she was born.

I'm impressed every day at how she's growing and developing.  Already she is sitting up (with assistance), grabbing and lifting toward her mouth, and babbling.  Speaking of babbling; her babbles sound more and more like language than just little coos.  Could she be an early talker?

Parenting - at least for the moment - is relatively easy.  Sometimes I get caught up thinking that my child is just the most perfect person to ever walk the Earth (of courseI'm sure every parent thinks this).  To an extent though it does seem at times that my little girl is becoming an overachiever like her dad.

But enough about her - I could go on about child development theory and what milestones she's getting close to, and how quickly she's achieving them.

Work v. Life Balance

Still working as an Optician, however it has become apparent to me that those above my boss won't open up my position to be full time.  While I have enough hours it's unfortunate that it's just enough.  In a manner of speaking I've come to a crossroad.  I can try to move elsewhere within a company I've worked at prior (in college) and apply my previous experience as a cashier and negotiate a full time position as a supervisor.  The other option I have is to keep looking around and applying for jobs, many of which are either in the medical field or in manufacturing.

Most of the opportunities for work that relate to my experience and tenure of my resume unfortunately don't pay very well, and leaping into another field of work inevitably means facing the unknown and risking not knowing anything about a job.  Most who know me well know that I prefer to expand within my academic goals and experience.  With most of my experience in typical white collar jobs it would be quite a transition to accept a blue collar position.

Plans To Continue My Education?

Since I left the Chicago suburbs - due to financial aid difficulties and inability to fund my own education - I've discovered through colleagues and others that there's a very slim job market for Meteorologists.  This of course I've taken into account, and after a couple years of thought and reflection on my academic career I've decided to make a slight adjustment to my academic plans.

During my time studying in the suburbs of Chicago I thought very seriously about a double major in Computer Science, given my enjoyment of computer programming and ability to work with computers on more than a basic level.  As I've discussed my interests and knowledge with my wife and friends it's apparent to me that perhaps I should consider well pursuing a career in IT.  The more I look into it the more I see a promising job market.  So this is definitely an option I'm greatly considering!

"But what of Meteorology?  Chasing storms?  Aren't you throwing all your learning and work away?"

Goodness no!  The weather will always be an interest, and I'd never carelessly throw away a piece of information on a whim.  I'll continue my interest as precisely that, an interest.  I'll still make observations and give reports via social networks to the National Weather Service.  It's just that I've decided to step back from a childhood dream and pursue something different, that's still an interest I've had since childhood.

So for now I've decided to teach myself the Python programming language.  After that probably Java as it seems knowing C and Java are good starting points and Python is a good bonus.  There's also certification sequences I can learn that can give me a start in IT related work.

So... long update!  There's been a lot on my mind and I've been itching to write and get my thoughts out, so... yeah.  You should probably know I can be long winded anyway 😜.

Utilitarian Relationships Refuted

This is something I wrote on Facebook a few years ago that I think is very much true today as it was when I originally wrote it.

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What's wrong with society nowadays is that we no longer really care about anything other than our egos. There is a trend whereby we love others so long as they remain perfect or at best beneficial to us. This is what makes most relationships one way. Essentially society has slowly led us to accepting utilitarian means as a normal part of relationships. Now this isn't to say that a business, or professional, relationship with an employer or a restaurant that one may frequent is bad, or somehow wrong. It is clear that there is an appropriate place for every kind of relationship. However here I focus on those relationships where no transactions of goods and services occur.

So what happens when we deem someone a "disservice" to us, or they come into some hardship, or perceive that someone has done some "irreparable wrong" to us? We typically react in one of two ways.

The first way is passive aggressive wherein we cower away from said person. We seem to develop an irrational fear which over the long haul prevents us from ever really having closure, or even seeking out opportunities to really reconcile or repair the break in the relationship. We choose to dehumanize that person and see them as a potential enemy, because that makes coping with the situation immediately easy. Thus we continue on our way never really attaining understanding. We just simply cut them off, because how could someone ever really be capable of good decisions when they made a less than perfect decision? In our minds we rationalize that every good decision really was not a good decision, and therefore was a lie disguised through whatever rose-colored lens we chose to see them in.

The second way is much more vicious. We attack them. We deliberately make them feel as though they are not capable of being good. We kick them when they are down. We say things that while to our perception seems good are actually negative things that bring the person down. We trap the person in a box with a label be it liar, thief, cheater, stupid, worthless... it's all negative. When that other person moves on with their life and in our eyes attempts to get out of the box we are quick to shove them back in. We make demands and bargains for the person to obey that are so ridiculous and impossible for the person that we give them no choice but to stay in the box. Because that is what we want. We want revenge! We want blood! And we want it two weeks ago!

While it feels good at the moment, because we get to be the one to make a stand, dispense discipline and punishment, be the one who wins, we miss out on an opportunity to really make peace and reach a common understanding. Because a juicy, vivid lie is much better than the dry, seemingly uninteresting truth.

If I may propose an alternative. What if we stopped crucifying every person who crosses us in some way? What if we stopped scapegoating someone just because we don't like them or don't like what they have to say. The next time someone crosses us, let us aim to understand. Come to understand what is going on in the person's life. Yeah, it's the hard way. Yeah, it doesn't make us feel good. But let's take a moment and realize that it's not about us or even the other person. It's about the dignity of the human person. It's about the fact that whether we like it or not that person is going to exist and keep existing on the same planet as us, and we might as well actually put in the effort to actually reach the peace we so often claim we desire - without seeking blood or revenge.

However, this is difficult. It requires we have to put aside how we feel about the person or situation and actually take the time to extend the olive branch and bury the hatchet. And for many, many people this seems like such an impossible task. Who knows, maybe the other person is offering the olive branch and you have your head jammed so far up your own butt that right now you can't see that.